Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Letting go, a little bit...

Today I decided I needed to do some cleaning. Not only is my house not yet on the market, it's no more ready than it was 6 months ago. I need to get moving if I ever want to move. Hah.

I have no place to put things anymore, especially in my kitchen where I spend most of my time. I recognize I need to get rid of the things I don't use anymore, before someone puts me on that show about hoarders.

A few months ago
I told you about all the snacks I bought my kids right before they died and how they were still in my pantry and how I was never gonna get rid of them. Well, I decided to it's time.

I guess I've realized that material things, for the most part, do not make me feel any closer to my kids. There are certainly some things - special clothes and toys of theirs - which evoke specific memories that I will hold onto as long as possible. And I will never get rid of any of their artwork. But snacks, well...

....they had to go.

I did take a picture first:

My mom gave me one of those Keurig coffee makers in early 2009 and sent some Hot Cocoa K-cups for Kate and Peter. The marshmallows in the picture were one of Peter's favorite things. He would ask for marshmallows in his cocoa, eat them all, then ask for more. He never drank his cocoa. It was merely a vehicle to bring the marshmallows closer to his mouth.

The aforementioned Pirate's Booty is not in the picture because earlier in the day today I thought maybe I'd eat some of it. It was in a sealed foil-ish bag so I thought it could still taste ok, right? Yeah, no. It tasted a little like styrofoam peanuts, or at least what I think styrofoam peanuts would taste like. So I threw it out.

I did hang onto one box of cereal:


  1. Thinking about you as you take these steps.
    The memories are what's important, as I can tell you realize. And what rich and vivid memories you have. Thank you for sharing them with us. I love the marshmallow story - so sweet.
    Take care,

  2. Totally understand this. This was part of your life with them. But...see ... you did get rid of the food, and... you kept the wonderful memories and stories ... and - further - relayed them to us beautifully. I love that you are documenting all of those wonderful moments that really do just hang there in time and will forever - the same in any house, really - only ...I wish you would have more moments with your Kate and Peter, and I know you miss them. I, on the other hand, am still getting to know them through your stories and your photos. Anyway, a hard day, I'm sure, but... I'm also sure your little ones don't want you featured on "Hoarders" ;-). The cereal box reminds me of that song you posted before ... "I'm soaring - flying..." just really got to me. I now picture your Kate along with my oldest when she was into High School Musical. Passages of any kind are so hard, and you are truly handling yours with grace and strength. Good luck with the organizing and packing :-).

  3. I am glad to see that you got rid of some of the things - but how great that you took a picture. Much better to have a picture of these things instead of the object themselves. I don't blame you one bit for holding onto some items. Sure, they don't keep you closer to them, but they do bring back fun memories that you might otherwise forget.

    You are so strong and are such a role model for me!!!